Consent and Satisfaction
Tori Douglas on Apr 2nd 2022
There are a lot of moving parts to sexual health. Sexual health is not just being free of disease or infection. Your sexual health is also wrapped up in having a good and satisfying sex life. Sex for the sake of sex is great, but pleasurable and satisfying sex is good for you mentally and physically. The key components of this kind of "good" sex are consent and communication.
We talk a lot about consent and communication here at the Badd Kitty blog. That is because these are the two most important parts of a healthy sex life. So let's dig a little deeper on the concepts of both consent and communication.
First, let's talk about consent. Always remember the acronym FRIES which stands for Freely given, Reversible, Informed, Enthusiastic, and Specific. Each one of these aspects is an important part of consent. Consent should not just be the initial agreement to sexual activity. It is so much more than that. Consent is an ongoing conversation that should continue throughout every sexual encounter. Consent should be given over and over during the sexual experience and can be revoked by either partner at any time during sex. Consent can be given both vocally and physically. It should not be intimidating or interrupt the experience. Consent should be given the utmost respect by your sexual partner or partners. It might feel strange for some of us to think of ongoing consent, but consent can be a simple "yes" or moving your partner's hand to where you want to be touched, or as intricate as telling your partner you explicitly want the encounter to continue. The main thing about consent is it is what you and your partner are comfortable with.
Consent cannot be achieved without good communication, and neither can good sex. Communication with your partner or partners is the key to sex. Consent and communication go hand in hand. The communication with your sexual partners starts far before you even touch each other. Good communication is the foundation for every relationship whether it is forever or just for the night. Communication grows over time, of course, but you should be comfortable telling your wants and dislikes to every partner you have in your sexual life. This leads to better and more satisfying sex each and every time.
Both consent and communication are about respect. In your sexual encounters, you should have respect for yourself, both your body and your mental and emotional health, and the wellbeing of your partner. You must respect the wishes and boundaries of yourself and your partner, and remember no means no and maybe means no.
Consent and communication are the heart of good sex. Good sex is at the heart of sexual health. So be open and honest with all of your partners about both consent and communication to keep that line of good information flowing. This should always be the basis of your sexual health.