Don't Fake It
Tori Douglas on Mar 10th 2023
Many women are guilty of faking orgasm during sex. There are many reasons women feel the need to do so. The most common reason is to make their partner feel good and like they "did their job" by making them orgasm. When women are with men, they tend to fake orgasm to protect their partner’s masculinity. This tendency to withhold sexual honesty from men to protect their masculine pride has been a part of women's psychology since the beginning of sex. We, as women, often do not want to ruffle any feathers by admitting we did not orgasm. Here is why you might think twice before the next time you fake it.
Faking orgasm is a breakdown in communication between partners. By faking it, you are not being sexually honest or practicing open sexual communication. Women who fake orgasm are not honestly communicating with their partners. In many cases, this means they would rather fake the orgasm than communicate their sexual needs with a partner. They may feel it will hurt their partners feelings to admit to them they did not orgasm from penetrative sex only, or from whatever sexual act the partner was performing. Sexual honesty and communication is more important than whatever reason you as a woman have for faking it. We talk a lot about sexual communication here on the Badd Kitty blog. That is because it is one of the most important elements of a safe and satisfying sex life.
The main reason to not fake an orgasm is you should be having orgasms if you want them. You should communicate your wants and needs sexually to your partner, even if it is a one night stand. This can be hard for many women. If you are comfortable enough to consent to sex, you should feel encouraged to be sexually honest about what will get you there. Most women do not orgasm from only penetrative sex. This means extra attention and foreplay. If your partner is not willing to take feedback and do what you need, are they the right partner for you? Most partners are welcoming of feedback that will make sex better for both of you.
Sometimes women do not orgasm with sex, and it can be ok like that. Women can sometimes be "satisfied" with a sexual encounter without an orgasm. Because men generally always orgasm with sex, they feel the need to make sure their partner has an orgasm every time. Women will then fake it to make the man feel like the encounter is over and everyone is satisfied. It is easier to fake an orgasm than to explain you did not orgasm and do not really need to at this particular time. Sex can feel great without orgasm.
Women should not have to fake orgasm, but should feel confident enough in their own sexuality and their relationship to share their sexual honesty and communicate freely. The benefits are not only more orgasms and a more satisfying sex life but a better relationship with your partner.